Weeknotes #9

Late again and I skipped last week because that week I skipped that Sunday I got so high I couldn't do anything teehee. I'll probably include some stuff from that week too.

Life

Last time I talked about getting denied for Spravato, but it turns out I was wrong! I guess after I got a call from the insurance company saying I was denied, the doctors talked them and got stuff sorted out?? So yeah, I started Spravato treatment. Not sure how much its helping yet but I'm excited to try something new.

Also a followup from last post with my edible adventures, after trying and getting used to indica, I decided to try sativa next. I took it in the afternoon on Sunday before writing my weeknotes since I heard some people say it makes them more energized and motivated. I also decided to take the whole 10mg gummy because I've already taken 10mg indica gummies and how different could they really be?? OH MY GOD. It kicked in faster and stronger than I expected, I was eating in the kitchen but then I started having trouble swallowing my food. Then I was basically just frozen in place staring off into the distance. I was worried about someone seeing me like this so I finally managed to get up and crawl myself into bed. At some point I fell asleep. Idk if the weed made me sleepy or it was just the fact that I was lying still in bed and my room was dark. Next time I'll just take half a gummy and see how I do with that but honestly I'm kinda scared now lol.

School

Going back to school after spring break has been pretty stressful, especially since now I have to fit the spravato sessions into my schedule. Another victim of the sunday weed gummy incident was an assignment I had due the day I got back from break. It was a presentation assignment, and I did get a good score on it, but I felt mine was worse than the other students who went that day so I wish I spent more time on it... If only the sativa really did boost my productivity instead of freezing me in place...

Reading/Watching/Gaming

Playing Subahibi is basically the only thing I did over spring break. While I was feeling the game at first, my interest did wane near in the latter part of the game when it changes directions in a pretty significant way. And touching back on what I talked about last time with "is this an eroguro game??" I can firmly say no, it absolutely is not. I got that impression because so many people were saying how its the most disturbing thing they've ever played, and usually when people talk about visual novels that way, they're talking about eroguro games like Euphoria and Maggot Baits. I don't really like reading long lists of trigger warnings before I play something, but I also don't really like this simultaneous hyping up of how fucked up the game is while also being evasive as to why, especially now that I've actually played the game and know what the content in question is. So I'll just put it here bluntly, there's a lot of rape. And because this is an eroge, the rape is illustrated and voiced and you may not think the subject matter is being treated with the tact it deserves. So yes, definitely a sensitive topic, but I feel it's not that hard to say "If you are interested in this game, there are a lot of detailed depictions of rape" instead of going "This is the most disturbing thing I've ever read. Prepare your eye bleach, you'll need it."

Might write a separate post on my thoughts, because I do have a lot of them and the direction change really haunts me but I don't want to go into details here because of spoilers and so I can give a mature content warning if I want to talk about anything with more detail. (And no, the reason the change in direction haunts me is not because of anything that would make me need "eye bleach", it's much more mundane than that.)

Anime time! Continuing with the Apothecary Diaries and started Brave Bang Bravern!. Episode 32 of the Apothecary Diaries was I guess a bit of a "filler" episode, but still enjoyable and I have a feeling that uh, the fact that they lady tried to kill everyone in the room might come back up later. As for episode 33, it left on such a big cliffhanger I don't feel like I can say anything about it until the next episode airs. (Penis cliffhanger!)

I saw comparisons between Brave Bang Bravern! and Samurai Flamenco before and now having started watching it I'd say it does indeed scratch that itch. There were also a lot of comments saying the robot is a metaphor for gay sex, and they weren't kidding. Not only is the robot a metaphor for gay sex, the robot is also an annoying homosexual himself. What a pleasant surprise.

Okay bye! Short notes for this week since they're like, double late already. I keep thinking "Oh yeah I'll have some time on Monday to do [blank]." but I have my Spravato appointment that day now and still haven't gotten used to the schedule change.